Balinkay
23rd December 2020, 11:29 PM
My dear forumites,
it is that time of the year again! Christmas is just around the corner, more importantly Boxing Day follows, then comes New Year's even and then we do it all again. However, before all of that a far more grandiose event must take place! The LFC Online forum awards!
Now, for the first time ever, this glorious show will be co-hosted by two younger forumites as the more experienced guard - Justin - has decided to pass the torch to two whippersnappers - CCTV and yours truly. We shall do our best make him and all of you lovely people proud!
Before we begin we would both like to express our sincere gratitude for yet another year of excellent footballing debate - now who's the best CM at the club again?, some annoying lows (damn you Atletico!) and some truly awe-inspiring highs (the Hendo shuffle once more!). This year saw the club win its first title in 30 years but it also saw the world plunge into a deep economic recession thanks to the worst pandemic seen in generations - not only did it stop football, but the entire world crawled to a halt.
Luckily, it looks like we can look onto a brighter 2021 with a possible cure or vaccine on the horizon and, almost as importantly, more trophies and wonderful moments gifted to us by the Mighty Reds! But enough about politics, let's talk awards!
We begin with the player awards. The Football Writers' Association ain't got nothing on us:
LFC Online Best Young Player of the Year: Trent Alexander-Arnold
A bit unfair towards the other lads, but TAA is still U23 and has been exceptional once more. Instrumental in our title win and easily in the conversation for best in his position on the planet. A wonderful player and a Scouser to boot!
LFC Online Player of the Year: Andrew Robertson
Simply the best and most reliable left back in the world. For decades the position had been one of anguish for LFC, but no longer. The Scotland captain has brought a stability and defensive prowess unrivalled in Europe to the fore. His attacking contributions rival those of the best playmakers of the present and near past and his stamina and determination know no peers. A true LFC legend in the making!
-----
The first forum internal category we would like to present is the prestigious thread of the year. Here the panel of esteemed footballing brains had little disagreement. By unanimous decision the prize goes to:
Thread of the Year: Post Title Thread
Yes, my dear forumites, we couldn't possibly overlook the raw emotion expressed after that most triumphant of moments. The pent up anger and disappointment of a 30 year wait was finally released. Let's hope it's the first of many!
And speaking on threads, we now move onto the second category - best debate. There really wasn't a single standout debate in the football forum or OT so the jury decided to award the prize to:
Best Debate: Anything involving CCTV
Our resident know-it-all likes to dig deep, discuss away issues and make use of just enough philosophical dark arts to keep discussions fresh, civil and informative. The forum would be a less argumentati... I mean fun place without you!
Continuing the topic of deep and stimulating conversations we now have the cat fight of the year award! Did I say "continuing"? Apologies, I meant "cuntinuing". Really there was only ever going to be one winner here:
Cat Fight of the Year: The dog whistle discussion
This epic multi-page, multi-thread and even multi-forum debate raged on for three straight days between one of the most respected, beloved, knowledgeable, fun posters on here, an overall great technician with a lot of character, a wonderful human being, a dip layin playmaker of unparalleled quality with the vision of Socrates, the technique of Cruyff, the drive of Gerrard and the longevity of Maldini, a vast wealth of footballing knowledge spanning back decades upon decades, huge fan of Don Diego Armando Maradona and, most importantly, a heart of gold and a willingness to accept other people's points of view and the humblest of all personas, rivalling even Mother Theresa on the one side... and Steveo on the other. Indeed, we got our knickers in a twist, but the wonderful air of friendship and support on here fostered a quick and painless resolution.
Which segues nicely into the next category - plot twist of the year. There have been plenty these past twelve months - from the club signing Jota instead of Sarr to Kev somehow not being a grumpy grandpa, but the undisputed king here is:
Plot Twist of the Year: vin is a moderator
Our beloved vin turned out to be a moderator! A damn good one at that, as his ability to deescalate stupidity aided some of us greatly. He's lurked like a masked vigilante on here for years moving posts and closing threads, noone knew who was doing it... and yet we all felt his presence. We now know this guardian spirit is none other than vin! Thank you from all of us!
This leads us nicely to the individual awards, starting with the coveted:
Birdwatcher Award: Insidious
Really, who else could it be but our lovable dog whisperer? His positivity and niceness has kept this forum in check over the years and we should all recognise just how important he is on here! This is why we've bestowed upon him this prestigious golden statuette, symbolising how he gases up at the sky and into the bright future of both the forum and the club, always on the lookout for that silver-songed lark!
And the next award was also a fairly easy decision
Biggest FFP Advocate: Insidious
He makes it two in two, lads and lasses! Noone has been more vocal about the club's ability to generate revenue and live within its means than our favourite birdwatcher. FSG don't actually pay him for the positive publicity but might want to consider sending a resume...
Now we come to a pair of awards that could only have one winner:
Biggest Shittalker of one of ours: 19x
His one-man crusade against Fabihno the DM would make even the Lionheart proud! None have vowed to vanquish their foe and lived up to their promise with such guile, presence, knowledge and batshite insanity as our beloved 19x.
Biggest Shittalker of one of theirs: RedNoodle
KDB has never had a foe as feared as our very own Noods. With tasteful and spiteful comments he's pointed out at every turn the hypocrisy of the media when it comes to both him and Sterling. We decided to give it to him for the KDB shite talking as it's more unique around the world, but make no mistake, we love the way you treat both of your targets.
But, naturally, in order to shite-talk people, you need to know stuff. Thus bringing us to the next award:
Most Knowledgeable Poster: Steveo
It was a tight call, but Steveo has shown outstanding understanding of the game over the past year and his wealth of experience and ability to take off the red specs makes every post of his an information bonanza worthy not only of any fact-based chat show, but also the British Museum itself! And no, we're not calling him old... directly..., just aged like a fine wine. One can always learn something from you, Steveo! Keep it up!
We now come to the coveted best poster awards. There's not much to say about these two, we all know who deserves them more than more than anyone:
Best Female Poster of the Year: FFF
Of course it's her! She doesn't post much, but when she does, it's always to the point and succinct!
Best Poster of the Year: RedNoodle
He has to get it. A much deserved award of Noods - always nice, always knowledgeable, always fun and sometimes even positive! What's not to love?
And now a special and more sombre award. This has been a tough year, but thanks to one poster in particular we've been kept up to date with the latest regarding the terrible virus:
COVID Correspondent: Taksin
We might not all agree with his interpretation of the facts, but we can all agree he does his best to post what is true and to let others see it as they please. Always open for a civil debate, averse to name calling... an overall decent fellow it seems! Cheers Taks!
But let's move on to some special individual posts:
Best Off Topic Post if of the Year: Definition of Pegging by justincredible
Well... not much competition here - it must be this one. I think it's safe to say we all learned something that day - either what pegging is or that justin is more twisted and sick than anyone ever thought. Either way, it's a win in my book!
And speaking of sick:
Best Booze Directory: justincredible
Was there ever any doubt? Let's move on quickly so as not to arouse suspicion from the Feds.
But seeing as it's that special time of year, we now move on to the most season-friendly category:
The Christmas Spirit Award: skyebo and miller0863
For being able to resolve a conflict amicably and in good spirit. Way to show the way... even if it is somewhat boring. When do you get to call each other exotic names?
But alas so we come to our final awards.
We have come to the decision that it is high time for this forum to have its very own Hall of Fame! And as such, 2020 will be the inaugural class! Six esteemed forum members have been meticulously picked out by the jury and have been awarded this prize more coveted than the Fields Medal and Ballon d'Or combined!
LFC Online Hall of Fame, class of 2020:
- Gary: without him none of us would be here! The man who started it all. Thanks for keeping this place alive for so long!
- justincredible: for a lifetime of jokes and gags, but more importantly for starting the forum award tradition and keeping its bright flame lit through all these years.
- RedNoodle, miller0863, skyebo: for lifetime contributions to the forum. Safe to say this place would not be what it is without their knowledge and cool characters.
- 19x: for a lifetime of insane ramblings that are as hilarious as they are bizarre... until you look a bit deeper and notice the wealth of footballing intelligence that oozes from every word.
Well that's all for tonight folks! We've honoured some of our most cherished members and we hope we've made your evening that little bit better. If you didn't win anything, git gud... errr.... I mean "Better luck next year!"!
Stay healthy, stay safe and enjoy the Holidays!
it is that time of the year again! Christmas is just around the corner, more importantly Boxing Day follows, then comes New Year's even and then we do it all again. However, before all of that a far more grandiose event must take place! The LFC Online forum awards!
Now, for the first time ever, this glorious show will be co-hosted by two younger forumites as the more experienced guard - Justin - has decided to pass the torch to two whippersnappers - CCTV and yours truly. We shall do our best make him and all of you lovely people proud!
Before we begin we would both like to express our sincere gratitude for yet another year of excellent footballing debate - now who's the best CM at the club again?, some annoying lows (damn you Atletico!) and some truly awe-inspiring highs (the Hendo shuffle once more!). This year saw the club win its first title in 30 years but it also saw the world plunge into a deep economic recession thanks to the worst pandemic seen in generations - not only did it stop football, but the entire world crawled to a halt.
Luckily, it looks like we can look onto a brighter 2021 with a possible cure or vaccine on the horizon and, almost as importantly, more trophies and wonderful moments gifted to us by the Mighty Reds! But enough about politics, let's talk awards!
We begin with the player awards. The Football Writers' Association ain't got nothing on us:
LFC Online Best Young Player of the Year: Trent Alexander-Arnold
A bit unfair towards the other lads, but TAA is still U23 and has been exceptional once more. Instrumental in our title win and easily in the conversation for best in his position on the planet. A wonderful player and a Scouser to boot!
LFC Online Player of the Year: Andrew Robertson
Simply the best and most reliable left back in the world. For decades the position had been one of anguish for LFC, but no longer. The Scotland captain has brought a stability and defensive prowess unrivalled in Europe to the fore. His attacking contributions rival those of the best playmakers of the present and near past and his stamina and determination know no peers. A true LFC legend in the making!
-----
The first forum internal category we would like to present is the prestigious thread of the year. Here the panel of esteemed footballing brains had little disagreement. By unanimous decision the prize goes to:
Thread of the Year: Post Title Thread
Yes, my dear forumites, we couldn't possibly overlook the raw emotion expressed after that most triumphant of moments. The pent up anger and disappointment of a 30 year wait was finally released. Let's hope it's the first of many!
And speaking on threads, we now move onto the second category - best debate. There really wasn't a single standout debate in the football forum or OT so the jury decided to award the prize to:
Best Debate: Anything involving CCTV
Our resident know-it-all likes to dig deep, discuss away issues and make use of just enough philosophical dark arts to keep discussions fresh, civil and informative. The forum would be a less argumentati... I mean fun place without you!
Continuing the topic of deep and stimulating conversations we now have the cat fight of the year award! Did I say "continuing"? Apologies, I meant "cuntinuing". Really there was only ever going to be one winner here:
Cat Fight of the Year: The dog whistle discussion
This epic multi-page, multi-thread and even multi-forum debate raged on for three straight days between one of the most respected, beloved, knowledgeable, fun posters on here, an overall great technician with a lot of character, a wonderful human being, a dip layin playmaker of unparalleled quality with the vision of Socrates, the technique of Cruyff, the drive of Gerrard and the longevity of Maldini, a vast wealth of footballing knowledge spanning back decades upon decades, huge fan of Don Diego Armando Maradona and, most importantly, a heart of gold and a willingness to accept other people's points of view and the humblest of all personas, rivalling even Mother Theresa on the one side... and Steveo on the other. Indeed, we got our knickers in a twist, but the wonderful air of friendship and support on here fostered a quick and painless resolution.
Which segues nicely into the next category - plot twist of the year. There have been plenty these past twelve months - from the club signing Jota instead of Sarr to Kev somehow not being a grumpy grandpa, but the undisputed king here is:
Plot Twist of the Year: vin is a moderator
Our beloved vin turned out to be a moderator! A damn good one at that, as his ability to deescalate stupidity aided some of us greatly. He's lurked like a masked vigilante on here for years moving posts and closing threads, noone knew who was doing it... and yet we all felt his presence. We now know this guardian spirit is none other than vin! Thank you from all of us!
This leads us nicely to the individual awards, starting with the coveted:
Birdwatcher Award: Insidious
Really, who else could it be but our lovable dog whisperer? His positivity and niceness has kept this forum in check over the years and we should all recognise just how important he is on here! This is why we've bestowed upon him this prestigious golden statuette, symbolising how he gases up at the sky and into the bright future of both the forum and the club, always on the lookout for that silver-songed lark!
And the next award was also a fairly easy decision
Biggest FFP Advocate: Insidious
He makes it two in two, lads and lasses! Noone has been more vocal about the club's ability to generate revenue and live within its means than our favourite birdwatcher. FSG don't actually pay him for the positive publicity but might want to consider sending a resume...
Now we come to a pair of awards that could only have one winner:
Biggest Shittalker of one of ours: 19x
His one-man crusade against Fabihno the DM would make even the Lionheart proud! None have vowed to vanquish their foe and lived up to their promise with such guile, presence, knowledge and batshite insanity as our beloved 19x.
Biggest Shittalker of one of theirs: RedNoodle
KDB has never had a foe as feared as our very own Noods. With tasteful and spiteful comments he's pointed out at every turn the hypocrisy of the media when it comes to both him and Sterling. We decided to give it to him for the KDB shite talking as it's more unique around the world, but make no mistake, we love the way you treat both of your targets.
But, naturally, in order to shite-talk people, you need to know stuff. Thus bringing us to the next award:
Most Knowledgeable Poster: Steveo
It was a tight call, but Steveo has shown outstanding understanding of the game over the past year and his wealth of experience and ability to take off the red specs makes every post of his an information bonanza worthy not only of any fact-based chat show, but also the British Museum itself! And no, we're not calling him old... directly..., just aged like a fine wine. One can always learn something from you, Steveo! Keep it up!
We now come to the coveted best poster awards. There's not much to say about these two, we all know who deserves them more than more than anyone:
Best Female Poster of the Year: FFF
Of course it's her! She doesn't post much, but when she does, it's always to the point and succinct!
Best Poster of the Year: RedNoodle
He has to get it. A much deserved award of Noods - always nice, always knowledgeable, always fun and sometimes even positive! What's not to love?
And now a special and more sombre award. This has been a tough year, but thanks to one poster in particular we've been kept up to date with the latest regarding the terrible virus:
COVID Correspondent: Taksin
We might not all agree with his interpretation of the facts, but we can all agree he does his best to post what is true and to let others see it as they please. Always open for a civil debate, averse to name calling... an overall decent fellow it seems! Cheers Taks!
But let's move on to some special individual posts:
Best Off Topic Post if of the Year: Definition of Pegging by justincredible
Well... not much competition here - it must be this one. I think it's safe to say we all learned something that day - either what pegging is or that justin is more twisted and sick than anyone ever thought. Either way, it's a win in my book!
And speaking of sick:
Best Booze Directory: justincredible
Was there ever any doubt? Let's move on quickly so as not to arouse suspicion from the Feds.
But seeing as it's that special time of year, we now move on to the most season-friendly category:
The Christmas Spirit Award: skyebo and miller0863
For being able to resolve a conflict amicably and in good spirit. Way to show the way... even if it is somewhat boring. When do you get to call each other exotic names?
But alas so we come to our final awards.
We have come to the decision that it is high time for this forum to have its very own Hall of Fame! And as such, 2020 will be the inaugural class! Six esteemed forum members have been meticulously picked out by the jury and have been awarded this prize more coveted than the Fields Medal and Ballon d'Or combined!
LFC Online Hall of Fame, class of 2020:
- Gary: without him none of us would be here! The man who started it all. Thanks for keeping this place alive for so long!
- justincredible: for a lifetime of jokes and gags, but more importantly for starting the forum award tradition and keeping its bright flame lit through all these years.
- RedNoodle, miller0863, skyebo: for lifetime contributions to the forum. Safe to say this place would not be what it is without their knowledge and cool characters.
- 19x: for a lifetime of insane ramblings that are as hilarious as they are bizarre... until you look a bit deeper and notice the wealth of footballing intelligence that oozes from every word.
Well that's all for tonight folks! We've honoured some of our most cherished members and we hope we've made your evening that little bit better. If you didn't win anything, git gud... errr.... I mean "Better luck next year!"!
Stay healthy, stay safe and enjoy the Holidays!